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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So this is not nearly as bad as some of the stories I read here, but wanted to toss it out for discussion.  DH and I have been happily married for 3 years, and are expecting.  My MIL is a nice woman in her late sixties, cultured, not intrusive and very welcoming to me.  She lives 20 minutes away from us (my parents are across the country).   My DH is very close with her - they talk almost daily and we see her every week or two.

Here is the thing: she is Russian, born and raised, although she's been here for 30+ years (a World Bank retiree), speaks English perfectly and is very comfortable in the U.S.  She is very devoted to the Russian language and culture, was determined to pass that along to her son, and spoke Russian only to my DH ever since he was born.  He went to Russian weekend schools, had to learn to read in Russian, was made to go to ballet and opera and generally every single Russian performance that came through town.  She has a substantial Russian-language library.

There is nothing wrong with all of this per se, except that to this day, when they are alone, they switch to Russian.   They always speak English when I'm around, and in fact would switch to English as soon as I walk into the room, so they don't do anything overtly excluding.  But when I am in another room or part of the house, I can hear them switching to Russian.  Like for instance, if [b]I'm having coffee on the deck and DH and MIL are cleaning up the kitchen[/b], I can hear them talking in Russian. Again, they always switch to English when I come in and in fact never speak Russian in front of me or when I am in the room, but I know that when I leave the room, if they begin to talk, they would switch back.  DH told me that he went through several rebellious phases when he would refuse to speak to her in Russian, but apparently she was tough as nails on this issue and it was speak Russian or else.

Do you think I SHOULD be bothered with this? I find it slightly bothersome but can't articulate a reason. Or am I simply being weird and should work on becoming more tolerant?

[/quote]
OP, if the bolded part is true, you should be sending your MIL flowers every week even if she never spoke in front of you at all. [/quote]

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