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[quote=Anonymous]I have a similar family make up to yours, except that I have three adopted kids.  If my SIL said something like this about my youngest, I probably would have said something at the time because I am not that good at controlling my mouth in such instances.  But, if I hadn't, I would call my brother and my SIL (separately) to let them know how out of line this was and that comments like that better never happen again.  If I had any doubt that my SIL would be anything but perfectly appropriate in the future, I want to say that I would cut them off.  But, family is important and cutting them off sends a message to your children as well - one that I don't think I am comfortable sending to my kids.  I'm guessing what I would actually do is that I would call my SIL out and embarrass her in front of everyone in the future.

I read where a PP mentioned that your youngest will hear such comments.  I agree.  But, for me, family should be totally accepting.

OP, you made me feel very lucky about the family I have.  They have so many faults, but not accepting my choices about how to form my family is not one of them.[/quote]

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