Reply to Do you regret not being more hard-charging / leaning in in your career?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The only thing I would say is that I've now realized (my daughter is 8) that [b]is actually easier to lean in when they are younger than when they hit school age.[/b]  The school events / activities can be overwhelming, and as someone who works full-time but had a stay-at-home mom, the guilt I feel on missing some things is awful.  (and I have a lot of flexibility in my job so I don't miss that much….)[/quote]

It's easier to lean in if you're fine with your very young children being in FT daycare.  And you may be, and that's great.

For my husband and me, it's not okay to have to have our infant and toddler (we have two under three) in daycare 40-50 hours a week.  And so we have both prioritized flexibility over prestige and compensation while our kids are young.  We'll revisit if/when we want to.  But for now, we're doing just fine financially, and we talk a lot about how glad we are to be doing what we're doing.  Neither of us would trade this time for anything.  You do miss things when your kids are in FT daycare, they're just not as obvious as the school play or the big game.  I mean that in a truly non-snarky way: it's just the reality of the situation.  [/quote]

My kids are young teens, and we used daycare for up to 50 hours a week from the time they were 3 months old. It was definitely the right choice for us because now I can afford to be semi-retired and not miss anything. To me, milestones when kids are 12 are much more interesting and important than when kids are 2 but of course YMMV.[/quote]

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