Reply to WWYD? We hate the name of our foster-to-adopt child

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Reply to "WWYD? We hate the name of our foster-to-adopt child"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This makes me so sad.

I am sure it is not the case, but it makes it seem like you want her not for the child she is, but for the dream child you prefer to have.

I think this is different from changing the name of an infant, or calling her by a nickname, or giving an older child the option of picking a new name like the Jayson poster.

My sister gave up an infant in a private adoption. She gave the child her first names out of love for the child, knowing her parents would likely change the name. When they reunited years later, the now teen was happy to learn of the orignial name...it was a part of her story.

Changing your daughters name because you have disdain for it and what it represents is not a positive way to bring her into your family. [/quote]

I adopted two older children from foster care.  Your post resonates with me.  I could never have changed their names, especially after using those names for so long.  I think it's weird that some posters think you ask a four year old what she wants her name to be.  I also think it's naive to think that a four year old would pick a name that OP would find acceptable.  I also can't believe that after having a child that you love you would still hate the name after the passage of time.  It does seem like OP is looking for something other than what she is getting.  [/quote]

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