Reply to Why Can't We Be More Like Our Mothers?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Well, we never wanted for anything.  My father died, however, leaving my Mom with a lot of debts. He became an alcoholic in his waning years - probably to fill the void left by having to stop flying - and eventually he let his law practice fail.   Fortunately for her, he left a good pension and decent retirement behind and she was able to settle a wrongful death suit that helped with the other bills.

If you visit the Udvar - Hazey Center, you can find my Dad's name on the memorial to recipients of the Distinguished Flying Cross (DFC).  He was a complicated man, but he helped to raise three strong, independent children and I am grateful he was my father!  [/quote]Nice story, pp.  Thanks for sharing.[/quote]

You have done quite a lot of romanticizing of your childhood and your parent's marriage. You see them as archetypes, not people. I bet your parents, were they alive and willing to be honest, would have completely different perspectives on the narrative you are spinning.

Happy people don't descend into alcoholism and failure; if his life was so much wrapped up into flying that it had made him a miserable person when it ended, then he never had a happy, well-rounded life. And I doubt your mom did, either.[/quote]I suspect the pp is not romanticizing her father but accepting both the good and bad he brought to the family.  My mom and dad also had their faults, including alcoholism (unaddressed in one but the other was in recovery), and my mom in particular drove me crazy at times.  But with the benefit of hindsight I can appreciate a lot of what I learned from her, eg, she taught me the importance of giving back to my community.  Being clear-sighted about your parents isn't the same as romanticizing them.[/quote]

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