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Reply to "What is reasonable to ask of in-town family in terms of help with kids?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Zero. You can expect zero and ask what she would like to do. It is up to her to tell you and up to you to try to facilitate. Your resentment is clear which is sad for your child. Try to let that go so your child can have a relationship without all your judgements.[/quote] This. Tread carefully. It was clear to me that my mom wanted to watch the kids alone because she would ask if we had plans to go out of town and would offer to watch them so we could go out of town for anniversary. I think you start with seeing MIL once a week as you might without kids. You are primary caregiver during those gathering. This once a week can include outings with MIL like eating out, kid plays, Playseum etc. If she expresses a desire to do more or be with kids on own, you facilitate. The key is that MIL interacts with the kids and has that time to get to know them, and it doesn't have to be in a caregiver capacity.[/quote]
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