Reply to DD does not want an exchange student to come

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I volunteered at my DDs (HS Junior) school to have a foreign excange student spend a week with us.  This would entail transportation, and maybe one or two nights for dinner at our home, the rest of the time will be spent with a group. I volunteered because my daughter was an exchange student last year and I thought it would be good to return the favor, and my DD is studying the language. Well my DD went nuts, demanded that I rescind the invitation, said she was too busy at school to accomodate the visitor, why would I do this when I work, she cant stay in my room, etc.  Can you understand this reaction?  DD is a bit of an introvert, and we live in a small townhome (compared to the vast homes of her friends), but I thought the student might appreciate that the location is close in.  But the DD reaction was over the top, should I wait for her to get used to the idea, or just cancel with the school? The student won't arrive till early spring.[/quote]

Before cancelling anything. I would try to work it out as much as possible. I agree with the other comments. Maybe apologies first or not consulting before hand but then tell her we can't not offer to host especially since she had gone on an exchange. Then work out a plan by saying what she is expected to do and what you too can offer.  I think there is also an aspect of invasion of her space too so what could you pre arrange" that she could pack away her things. Is there a den to house away her things which you too will respect and not invade? Working out boundaries is key but the outcome and decision is worked through by you and she HAS to discuss and work at the eventual outcome of the exchange student coming. If all really fails and your dd is not yet mature enough to handle hosting a guest then it's a different decision you make based on that circumstance. But it shouldn't be because you bow to her tantrum fit because more things will come![/quote]

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