Reply to Another Unequal Grandparent Treatment Question

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What does DH say about this, since this is his family ?  If it were my own mom, I'd probably ask that we not open gifts together in such a situation (can't do anything about the favoritism but at least the kids should learn that generally it's bad form to be so obvious about it.)

Perhaps DH should be refereeing this one.  
[/quote]

He doesn't see it (or doesn't want to admit it).  He is one of three, and his brother and I completely agree on this issue and it has slowly opened up his eyes, but he values being with family.  I might talk with my BIL and see if we can come to an understanding.  There is no question who the favorite grandchildren are, so my BIL might be helpful here.  [/quote]

OP, DH will probably never "see" it. Too hurtful. Perhaps you can change the GPs, but perhaps not. I have definitely noticed that the recipient of the "extras" never "sees" it the same way. just human nature.[/quote]

+1! This is where being the "evil" DIL came at an advantage for me. I got fed w/FIL's cheap manipulation tactics when I was pregnant with my third DC and let into him in front of DH in no uncertain terms. DH had a choice: stupid repetition compulsion of trying to get "Daddy's love" or watch pregnant DW walk away with kids from A$$h*Le Grandpa. Guess who won?

Look, maybe DH has been so traumatized by constant manipulation from FIL that what you have to do is slap both of them in the face with reality that: 1, you don't love FIL/grandpa or MIL/grandma and that you can totally live without them; 2, they're messing with your kids, which is NEVER OK; 3, you can walk away and never have to see FIL/grandpa or MIL/grandma again because they have NO legal rights to visitation; and 4; the person who loves DH is you OP.

It's time to stand up.[/quote]

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