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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]IOne of the things that gives me pause when I think about adopting is that I'm not sure how well I'd be able to handle a child who struggles academically. I grew up in a family of high achievers that valued education above all else. I'm no genius, but academics were always so easy for me, that even with my own daughter who is bright and not SN I sometimes find myself getting exasperated and yelling when she fails to grasp something that seems obvious. [/quote]

Oh wow, just wow.  I don't know how old your DC is but this is an incredibly unhealthy dynamic.  You have essentially admitted that what matters to you most is academic achievement, to the point that you wouldn't even want a child who couldn't achieve.  So I'm sure your DD is getting this message that you will only value her as long as she gets the grades.  You yell at her when she doesn't seem as bright as you expect.  One day your DD is going to fail a class or get so overwhelmed and depressed and/or anxious that she doesn't even want to go to class or maybe she will get a B and believe it is the end of the world or perhaps she will be perfect and get straight As and know deep in her heart of hearts that she has to keep it up or she will be failure in her your eyes.

Its OK for kids to screw up and have trouble and struggle to understand something and if they don't learn that in childhood it means a world of pain for them as adults.

I'm just feeling bad for your DD.  And pretty glad you didn't adopt with that attitude.  At least if she screws up you won;t blame it on your superior genes.[/quote]

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