Reply to help remind me about being patient and understanding with husbands depression

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "help remind me about being patient and understanding with husbands depression"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It is the illness talking, not the person. But that is hard to separate out and not take personally when the illness and person are so intertwined.

When I hear something that is angry, irrational and out of character, I just tell myself it is the depression talking and ignore it, same as if he said something under the influence of heavy pain meds/anesthesia [/quote]

13:16 here. I do that too, but I also keep him accountable. It is a very slippery slope with stuff like the verbally abusive things that many depressed people are prone to say. H knows that it's not okay to say cruel things to me, that it's not okay to blame me for things, that flying off the handle in front of the kids is not okay. While I agree that there are "under the influence" elements, he is still a person who is at least partially in control. If he feels himself becoming angry or aggressive, I would much prefer if he walked away, took a break, etc. to avoid saying cruel things. I refuse to accept and excuse verbal abuse simply because he is depressed. He knows exactly what he's saying and chooses to say very specific things that he knows will be the MOST hurtful.[/quote]

I am the PP you are responding to and I agree. It doesn't mean he can be abusive or aggressive without responsibility - but more that I don't personalize it or hold it against him personally. I agree though that he has to figure out how to manage it and if it is taking over or he is starting to feel out of control then that is a sign that he needs to re-tweak his treatment plan.[/quote]

I completely agree and have said as much plenty of times. We have differences of opinion about his treatment plan.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics