Reply to Newly Married, Separate Finances?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We have joint finances and I don`t ask permission. I doubt that is how many people work. We just see it as our money instead of as your money and my money. Some people (not all) that have joint finances also still each have little separate accounts for fun money / gifts.

I think Op the fact you are doing this arrangement to keep a certain aspect of your finances hidden is a problem. I think separate accounts can work but not when one person has a part of their life they aren't comfortable with the other person knowing about. [/quote]

If people making a big deal about having joint finances also "still each have little separate accounts for fun money / gifts," then that that's what I described as being yours/mine/ours, which maybe should be renamed ours/mine/yours (not OP, poster #2). Maybe it's just that we find our joint account well enough and we have enough money left over that our side accounts are bigger than most people's.

I agree, though, that if this was all really OP trying to hide some money (maybe alimony from a previous marriage?), that is trouble.[/quote]

OP here.  I had the same thought when others described their side accounts.

She's aware of the dollar amount and duration of the pre-marital obligation so it's not to hide it from her.  However, let's say we pool everything into a joint account and if I have an issue paying that obligation down the road (sickness, loss of employment, etc.) then said obligation can go after that joint account.  That's what I mean by keeping it my issue and not making her deal with it.[/quote]

This sounds very noble OP, but the day you marry, they can come after her financially too, whether your name is on e account or not. I can't tell you how many times my moon has paid down my dad's personal credit card so they stop calling HER.[/quote]

Just because collection agencies called your mom about your dad's debt doesn't mean she's legally obligated to pay it.  It's a little more nuanced with respect to consumer goods purchased for the marital home but I wouldn't hold out the actions of a debt collector as representative of anything.[/quote]

Perhaps, but people often have to engage lawyers or per advocates to flush the so-called "nuances." Still something to be concerned about.[/quote]

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