Reply to Would you allow your wife to be a surrogate

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yeah, this whole surrogacy = prostitution argument rests on the idea that everyone considers prostitution to be evil. That's a particular moral view I don't share.

But setting all that aside -- unless this is something that the OP is really considering, is this really a "money and finances" issue? It seems like just an idle question unless someone is really considering this. [/quote]

I have friends of ours considering it - for the money only.  She is a stay at home mom and the husband wants her to get a job.  She wants to stay home with the kids.  This was what she came up with - exclusively for the money aspect.  They'd pay bills off in one swoop but would probably not have any extra afterwards.  (He wants her to get a job at least until the credit card debt is done...so her idea completely satisfies his underlying reason that she be employed).[/quote]

In this case, I would stay far away from surrogacy.  It is not easy money.  Using IVF there is a high risk of early pregnancy bleeding which often means more appointments, is emotionally difficult and can also entail bed rest.  There are also miscarriages and cycles that don't work, which are also emotionally draining and exhausting.  It could easily take a few years before she would even see the full comp for carrying a baby to term.  As a general example, an aggressive and lucky timetable puts the whole process at about 18-19 months (2 months screening with an agency, 2 months matching with a couple, 2-3 months medical screening and legal contract, 2 months lead to cycle, 1 month of injectable meds prior to transfer and then 9 months of actually being pregnant). A first time surrogate may make $24,000. That is $1,297 a month over say 18.5 months. If she takes a job at $22/ hour and works 15 hours a week she's ahead money wise with a PT job and has not put her life and health at risk. and that us presuming the transfer is successful the first time, which is not the norm.

A surrogate pregnancy is nothing like a pregnancy she would carry for herself.  If she is still interested I would recommend reading SMO (surrogate moms online) to get a better picture of all that surrogacy entails.

Now.... If she has a desire to help a family have a baby and the money would be a nice bonus, that's a different story. Every compensated surrogate is using the money for something, it's just only a part of the picture.  If its the while picture it's unlikely to be a positive experience and/or successful.

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