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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am either invisible or bullied.

Once, a coworker actually said to someone else while the three of us were chatting something about how women like me (ugly) aren't the type to be asked to get married. As soon as it was out of her mouth she got embarrassed but still.

People always assume I don't want to be in a picture or they don't want me to be in their picture, so I wind up invited to play photographer a LOT.

I am physically touched very little.

This may just be shallow people, but sometimes people will pick one feature of mine and then fawn over it, always though it is followed by asking me for a favor. I don't know why it is assumed  that ugly = too dumb to notice.

I'm not treated "like a lady." Doors are constantly dropped on me by people walking ahead. I can be the only person standing on the train, then an average to pretty woman boards and two men will jump to give up their seats for her.

Pretty women will do the humble-brag and then act like I'm so lucky to not have to worry about their problem of two great men being interested in me. [/quote]

Not trying to be mean, genuinely curious.  Most "ugly" people are ones who do not take care of themselves and are not really ugly.  They get picked on because their clothing is outdated, they still wear bright pink lipstick, their hair is stuck in the 80's, wear pigtales, side pony tales, etc.  My aunt for example would be picked on for her clothing and hair choice- but she doesn't want to cut her hair so she is a 60+ woman sporting the ill fitting clothing, outdated makeup and long long long hair that she gets put in a French braid, etc.  My mother and her share several traits but my mother looks nothing like her probably because the kids nag her about hair, clothing, make up.

So, have you considered a make over?  Or are you saying you need plastic surgery?  I also think confidence goes a long way...[/quote]

I am fairly confident. But I've also seen good looking men cringe when they mistake my friendliness for flirting (I've had guy friends confirm this - that they are embarrassed at the idea of someone ever thinking they'd be interested in me back). I have unfortunate skin (it's now as good as it gets without extensive plastic surgery that I can't afford) and unfortunate hair (super thick and frizzy and quick growing - if it grew slower I'd consider Keretin straightening if I could afford it), etc. My clothes are great. Keep in mind I spend Friday nights at home, so I've logged YEARS of advice from Stacey and Clinton on their show. I'm just ugly. No way around it. And I haven't rocked a side ponytail since sixth grade. [/quote]

PP, I can relate a lot.

I've early 30s, but for years have been just straight up not attractive. I've gotten so many comments from acquaintances and strangers (the people that I choose as my friends don't comment on my appearance negatively) about how I am unattractive. In middle school, I was voted by a group of boys the ugliest girl in school. I would go to bars with my friends, and all of them would get some kind of male attention, or a group of guys would come up to talk to us, and I would be the only one they ignored. In fact, I distinctly remember trying to talk to one of the guys, and he rolled his eyes and walked away. My hair is frizzy, my skin is not so great, I'm short and tend towards the chubby, but moreso my body shape, regardless of how thin I get, is just off. Small boobs, broader shoulders, always have a tummy. Let's just say, I didn't win the genetic lottery.

I've spent years feeling bad about it, but then I just stopped caring. I realized, I just need to look the best I can. I invested in some good skin care products which have made my skin look slightly more average (not great like some people - but better than it would look), I religiously get my hair cut and styled every 8 weeks and I do my hair all the time (there is no wash and let dry for me), I exercise religiously so even if my body is not "hot" at least I'm healthy (I'm still chubby and frumpy, but I've got some muscle), and I found a husband and friends that value me for me, that love me regardless of the fact that I gained 35 pounds during pregnancy that I haven't gotten off 3 years later and that my eyes are too close together and that my nose is a weird combination of fat, round and pointy.

But I am still not attractive. It's okay, I love myself. But I'm not going to pretend I'm something that I'm not. So people that say "Well, everyone can be pretty", that is not true. Some of us are just unattractive. I used to feel terrible about it, but the key is to find people that don't care about your appearance. And it all evens out as we get older, cause everyone tends toward the ugly later in life.[/quote]

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