Reply to my friend and her daughter always puts down my daugher

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You just have to decide if it's worth spending any of your time with this woman.  If you find yourself dreading each encounter with her or, more importantly, if your daughter seems to be hurt by this woman every time that she sees her...time to find other things to do.

There's a big enough gap in the ages between your daughter and the 7 year old that it should be quite easy to find other activities for your daughter that don't involve the 7 year old.  No need to "have it out" with her or anything, just move on.[/quote]

OP, please re-read the second paragraph above!  Absolutely true! The age difference between your child and this 7-year-old means there really should not BE any after-school or other activities that are appropriate for both girls! There is a world of difference between a kid of 7 and a nearly-middle-schooler who is 11. You mention that your daughter has friends who have moved to another community but does still play with other kids her age who have remained. That's fine but please also seek out activities to help your daughter meet more and different girls her own age -- Girl Scouts is great for this, or a religious youth group if that's your family's thing, or interest-based kids' classes in whatever she likes (art, drama, dance, music, musical theatre, sports, academics, whatever).

The swimming lessons are a pain because you have to cross paths with these people, but do the lessons go on and on or is there a time when they finish and your sessions are done? Can you get another time when the next sign-up comes along?

Also, when your child moves to middle school she will probably lose much of her concern about what this child says to and about her, and will be better able to ignore this kid. Your daughter will be busy with a new school, new friends, navigating new classes, doing more homework. That will help her shrug off this kid -- but meanwhile you [u]must[/u] shrug off the mom. The mom is already taking up too much of your mind and your energy as you wonder and worry about her. Always be too busy to talk, be on the way to somewhere else ("Nice to see you, but we have to leave for class/Girl Scouts/grocery store/whatever now"). You indicate that she is part of a larger group of mutual friends you both share -- that is tougher, but you may have to get out there and make some friends who are not part of this group.

This other mom sounds needy, as if she wants to bring drama and envies you somehow. Be too busy for her![/quote]

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