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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My kids know the rule: If you want to go to college, you have to pay for it.

Oldest worked her ass off at school and got a full ride to a good college, second worked 40hrs/week during summers starting 9th grade and had part time jobs during the school year and is paying essentially out of pocket + a few scholarships. Youngest one is currently a sophomore and relying on loans plus a little saved up over her high school career.

Our kids knew that they had to do the work to get jobs. Some parents can "hire" their kid at their own company, but we couldn't, and wouldn't. Some might see it as mean or bad parenting, but you have to realize that we won't be able to pay for their first house, or their wedding, or their graduate school. If we pay for their college, they never will learn to pull their own way. They will expect us to bail out their bad decisions. And if DD1 couldn't find a job over the summer and needed a bit more money, we would probably loan her a bit (with interest) as we know she is a hardworking adult who will pay us back.

[b]I see parents paying for their kids to go to college, and it makes me sad. Those are kids who will never truly be independent. We could pay for college for our kids, but we decided that it was not our jobs.[/b] [/quote]

I see kids whose parents don't pay for college and I feel really, really sorry for them. They are not getting as much out of the college experience as they could because they have to spend so much time working. [/quote]

[b]Yeah, it should be my job to subsidize my kid's partying.[/b][/quote]

You are your own problem.  If you don't have higher expectations for your kids than that, I feel sorry for them.  I plan to help pay but my child will know that it will be contingent upon effort and outcome to a certain degree because we have high standards for him.  Sounds like maybe you don't?[/quote]

+1.  I have 2 kids in college.  Sure they party some and I would expect them to.  But they also get excellent grades, are active in student service organizations and have gotten some great internship and research (work study) opportunities that has resulted in some great pre-professional exposure.  Stuff they could not do if they were pulling a few shifts at TGIFridays during the week.   They both have some scholarships and grants but we pay a little more than half....and they are both pretty ambitious and independent.  In my view, it is money well spent.

So I agree with PP.  If you think that your kid's college experience boils down to partying then somebody's bar is too low. [/quote]

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