Reply to Why don't some people have any friends?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]
    Anonymous wrote:Just to pile on - please please please don't try to "fix" your introvert husband. Introverts are different from you - but we are not "broken" or "on the autism spectrum" just because we don't need people around all the time and don't feel the need to share all the f'ing time.

So you're content to having no friends and spending nights and weekends home alone because you're not able to maintain a connection with another human being?

There is "introvert" and then there is "socially awkward". [/quote]

NP here.

Wow, PP, I don't know whether you meant it, but your response is incredibly insulting and presumptuous.

Just because someone is an introvert who doesn't need people around all the time does not remotely translate into having no friends or being unable to maintain a connection with another human being. How does a thinking person make such illogical leaps?

Leaving your nonsense judgments, I think the issue is in how we define close friendships and what we expect to get from these friendships on a regular basis. If you are an introvert, you have friends, they just might not be local and maybe you don't need frequent contact with them to be satisfied with your relationships. People who mourn not having more frequent contact with their friendships are not introverts...they are people who may be lonely because what they need from their friendships doesn't match what they are getting from their local friends. Two different things.

I'm an introvert who doesn't need a lot of social time, which sometimes disappoints my friends who want to hang out more frequently. I have people who would help me out if I were sick and whom I would go out for even when I thought I was too tired or ambivalent to talk to someone else. I have incredible empathy for people who are not introverts and who really want a BFF they talk to every day and see several times a week and just can't find that person locally. That sounds lonely. But again, it sounds like an issue of friendship expectations and people's needs.

People who don't have plans every night with other people aren't people without friends or meaningful attachments nor are they socially awkward by definition.

(That may be a personal best of number of negatives in a single sentence right there. Go me.)

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