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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Is BM a celebration of materialism?[/quote]

Not for us. Ours was a celebration of our son's coming of age, and reading from the torah.  Yeah, I fed a lot of people lunch, but heck, they came out for a 150 minute service.

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IMHO I definitely think it has become an excess display of materialism, wealth and "I-can-top-you".  Have you ever seen the movie, "Keeping up with the Steins"?  (hilarious).  Here's what wikipedia says about it in its section on bar mitzvahs (I do hope you know there is no such thing for women in the Orthodox community because, historically, women didn't count towards the minyan needed to start COMMUNITY prayers):

Bar mitzvah parties [edit]

B'nai Mitzvah festivities typically include a seudat mitzvah a celebratory meal with family, friends, and members of the community. Others may celebrate in different ways such as taking the bar mitzvah on a special trip or organizing some special event in the celebrant's honor. In many communities, the celebrant is given a certificate. The main idea according to the Orthodox view is that this boy or girl is so happy that they are now commanded to do mitzvah and now they will earn reward in the next world for their efforts, that they throw a party and have a festive meal.

[b]Bar and Bat Mitzvah parties in America are often lavish affairs held at hotels and country clubs with hundreds of guests.[5][6][7] The trend has been mocked, most notably in the movie Keeping Up With The Steins[/b]. Rabbi Shmuley Boteach says that over-the-top bar mitzvah parties were already common when he was growing up in Miami in the 1970s.[8]

The most vulgar Baht Mitzvahs I have been to were in Florida.  Save-the-date cards. Lavish photo invitations.  Hundreds of thousands of dollars for a "themed" dinner.  Rock band.  Others have been in New York City with lavish dinner and dancing in the restaurant at the top of the World Trade Center (sigh).  Maryland ones (and I've been to many) seem to be a competition which parent can pay more and invite over 1,000 people.  The Virginia ones I have been to were tasteful - but that's only two.

I can understand why the more Conservative and some of the Reformed rabbis are worked up about this:  a much better mitzvah would be to donate all that money to a good charity.

This isn't even an issue in the Orthodox community because it is still treated as a sacred event.  And women aren't allowed a Baht Mitzvah at all.

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