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[quote=Anonymous]Modern parenting has a lot of fear mixed up with it. I'm not saying our parents never worried, but I don't think they often operated primarily from a place of fear.

One of the biggest impacts on my parenting was a casual conversation with a mom with teens when my kid were early elementary. She said - make sure there are more than a couple of years between them learning how to cross to street independently and learning how to put on a condom. That put a LOT in perspective for me and it definitely affected the way I think about my kids gaining independence and life skills.

Sometimes it seems that many parents think that risk can be *fully* eliminated. It comes up all the time here when people say "teenage driving is risky, therefore I'll keep my kids from driving until they aren't teenagers anymore (or 18+)" ... which always makes it seem like all risk has been eliminated. But what risks are present with preventing a kid from gaining independence at this age? If your child doesn't drive, are they allowed to ride with friends who do drive? (Note that it is much harder to tell what kind of driver your kids' friends are, you will know how good of a driver your kid is bc you're the one teaching them!) Or if they're not allowed to be with any teen drivers at all, how does that affect them socially and mental health wise?

Teen driving is a hot-button issue but you can substitute any scenario at all for this, including walking to the park and cooking and pretty much anything else, but the point is that I think that the idea of eliminating risk altogether is a modern parenting thing, even though eliminating 100 percent of risk is not possible or really desirable.

Even as I write this, I know it's likely that there will be a response saying that obviously I don't care about my kids (or that Im a "checked out parent" like someone has already stated about a PP) but I actually think this mindset makes me a better parent and helps prepare my kids for leading their lives independently.

I wouldn't categorize myself as a free range parent -- the idea of middle schoolers swimming in the ocean without an adult is not for me -- I say this to make it clear that it is definitely possible to allow freedoms and independence while still having some guardrails on. I lessen risk when I can. I try very hard to allow my kids to experience situations that are appropriate ... even if they are uncomfortable for me ... because, while I know that some things ARE easier about the days where you have that little baby on your hip and you get to control so much of what happens, the goal here is to raise independent adults. 
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