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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My sister just filed for divorce. My BIL was always a quirky guy, awkward, but super nice. Likely on the spectrum. I always liked him a lot and found him pleasant company. My opinion doesn’t matter to their divorce, but mentioning him matters to the divorce, I think. She’s divorcing him because she’s tired of “socializing him”. He’s who he always was; he’s always been the same man she married. But he’s quiet, and awkward, and quirky. The clincher? Their son is also autistic, and will likely have the same issues his whole life. [b]I feel really weird about her stance towards her husband when their son is so similar. What does that say about how she feels about her own son’s future? [/b]I don’t know, I’m probably not thinking objectively. What am I missing? I need an unbiased lens. [/quote]

I agree with a lot of the PPs but I wanted to highlight the bolded because that seems to be where "hypocritical" is coming from. 
You're suggesting that if she divorces the BIL, that means she thinks her child is unlovable by others or thinks that her child shouldn't marry. Please internalize that her marital status does not change anything about her kid or her feelings. She loves her kid. She may or may not believe an adult with her kid's condition should marry, and she'll hold that belief (whatever it is) regardless of whether she divorces your BIL. The divorce is not a statement about the worth of the child or her hopes for the child's future.[/quote]

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