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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My sister just filed for divorce. My BIL was always a quirky guy, awkward, but super nice. Likely on the spectrum. I always liked him a lot and found him pleasant company. My opinion doesn’t matter to their divorce, but mentioning him matters to the divorce, I think.

She’s divorcing him because she’s tired of “socializing him”. He’s who he always was; he’s always been the same man she married. But he’s quiet, and awkward, and quirky.

The clincher? Their son is also autistic, and will likely have the same issues his whole life. I feel really weird about her stance towards her husband when their son is so similar. What does that say about how she feels about her own son’s future? I don’t know, I’m probably not thinking objectively. What am I missing? I need an unbiased lens. [/quote]

There is no clincher here OP. The son has social needs and needs strong proactively parenting to become a functional adult. That’s unlikely to come from a special needs father, in fact there may be undermining.

The women I know who tried to hang on in these lopsided marriages were being emotionally abused and neglected, as were the kids.

Then one day the special needs husband decided to leave and divorce, blaming the wife for not paying him enough love and attention, yet she was forced to do everything and prop him up. He continues to be very needy. [/quote]

+1000

Give your sister a big long hug Op. she probably hasn’t had someone hug her in years. (Besides a baby).[/quote]

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