Reply to My 77-year-old mother is lying and I don’t know what to make of it

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't know why they do this, but my mom has gone from kind of understandable little lies that I could attribute to misremembering things or not wanting to get caught doing something wrong, to essentially pathologically lying every time she answers a question.  It drives me insane but also makes me wonder if this is an early symptom of dementia?

Example (she lives with us, and watches TV at night in the room where I work all day):
Me: Do you know what happened to the remote?
Her: I don't know what you're talking about.
Me: Oh it didn't work this morning, but it was working yesterday.
Her: I didn't notice anything.
Me: Oh.  I thought it looked like you might have tried to switch the batteries out to get it to work.
Her: Yes, I did.
Me: And did it work after that?
Her: No.
Me: . . . then why did you just say you didn't know what I was talking about?
Her: I don't know!

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat the heck.  And it's stuff like this: low-stakes, but continuous, and feels like a mix between being gaslit and being lied to by a teenager trying to get away with something.  It's baffling and I get pretty pissed off because it seems so deeply unnecessary, but it's constant.[/quote]

I could have written this except my mom doesn't live with me.  Honestly, any unexpected question seems to really throw her for a loop and I think it's just cognitive decline (she is 80).  She'll be telling me what she wants me to grab at the store for her (if I offer to grab her something when I'm headed there for example) and she'll say, "potatoes".  I'll say "no problem- any particular kind?"  and she'll say "i want to make that potato salad.  remember your Aunt Larla used to make a potato salad?  Gosh, it would get so hot in her backyard when she'd have those get togethers.  Anyways, yes, um- uh- the potatoes."   And I'll say again "so any kind should be ok? I'll just grab what i think is best."  And she'll say "oh.  Um.  You know.  Well! I'll tell you how you can tell the right ones.  They'll be firm and lighter than those dark Russet ones.  Smaller but not too small.  I suppose i'll want a few handfuls.  Well let's see.  How many people will I be serving?  Just the 2 of us.  So- let's see- a moderate portion for your father and a small portion for me, so, let's see."  And I'm like jesus christ woman I'm already in the checkout line.

Anyways, I know it's age, but it still frustrates me to no end. And if she offers to do me a favor and I am brave enough to say yes, I end up spending the greater portion of the day assisting her in doing me this favor that I didn't even need done.

Sorry for the vent.  Anyways, yeah, it's age! She doesn't want to watch your kids.  I'm sorry. [/quote]

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