Reply to 3rd grade daughter dropped by former bestie

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP back! I do appreciate this feedback and I totally hear that my activity planning and playdate stuff might have come off as aggressive or self serving. [b]It really didn’t come from that place (really truly I have a job where I’m available after school and they do not and their kid didn’t get into our district’s aftercare program - I was honestly trying to “be a villager” because I think it’s hard out here for everybody!). But I can see the other side for sure. This why I asked here! [/b]

I would actually be so fine if they all just wanted some space — I see here that I seem controlling or whatever but I like said I’ve always told dd to diversify friendships in case something like this happened. It’s the 180: the ghosting and the meanness (I saw the “Go away [dd]” myself when I was volunteering at an after school event).

And yes for sure I’m having a hard time with it and that’s on me; my daughter is just feeling adrift and, aside from continuing to push her to broaden her experiences and activities and circle, idk what else to do when she’s still holding on to something that I see as dissolved where she either doesn’t see it or doesn’t WANT to see it.

Thanks again, all! [/quote]

I picked up on this from your OP and was one of the early commenters. I think, to be blunt, these parents really suck if you did all of this childcare for them and they are now also ghosting you. I wouldn't convey that message to my kid, obviously, but it says a lot about the family.[/quote]

But this is precisely why I am skeptical that OP's perspective is the full story. Because if it's as OP said, then these parents are just jerks and users. And yes, there are people like that in the world. But OP says she's known this family for four years and the kids were close. I have a hard time believing that for 3 years the family was great and the kids were close, and then suddenly in year 4, the girl ditched OP's DD and the parents just ghost.

I really think the most likely thing is that the girls had a falling out that OP doesn't have the details on, and that what is being perceived as "ditching my DD for the cool kids" and "ghosting" may actually be the other girl setting a boundary and the parents feeling awkward that the girls are no longer friends.[/quote]

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