Reply to Belle Burden's "Strangers" -- why is old money-obsessed DCUM not aflame with discussion?

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Reply to "Belle Burden's "Strangers" -- why is old money-obsessed DCUM not aflame with discussion?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not surprised her husband left. She’s vapid and obsessed with clubs, private schools and her family lineage. The details made for an interesting read but also demonstrated to me why he got tired of her. I’ve known some women who live in her orbit and their entire existence revolves around money and lifestyle. It’s boring. [/quote]

+1 I was surprised to hear her say in an interview there were zero signs. I don't think she's the sharpest tool in the shed because how on earth can there be no signs your husband is capable of something like this? I think her extremely privileged life and all the years she spent at home made her naive. [/quote]

I have long thought that the lifestyle of many very wealthy people is bascially designed to allow married people to live separate lives and cheat on each other. There is no forced togetherness for the family out of necessity, because there is enough money that people never *have* to live in the same home or go on the same vacation or really do anything together. Not just parents, but kids too -- this is why boarding schools exist, as well as 24/7 nannies. The wealthy families I have known that don't have cheating/dysfunction have always gone out of their way to mostly live and travel together, even though their money makes it possible not to. That means kids are in local schools, and parents live at home during the school year and show up to school events (both of them) and participate in stuff like drop off and activities car pools, even though they could obviously hire that out. It means eating meals together even if it means someone has to go back to work after. It means scheduling vacations around school and work schedules and not just shuttling the kids and SAHM off while DH goes on work travel or stays behind to work. It means prioritizing the family unit and not just individual relationships within the family.

Not saying you have to do absolutely everything together but it should be the default. Just because you can afford to spend July in Spain with a girlfriend while the kids are at nice camps and your DH is back in NYC or traveling to visit clients doesn't mean that's a smart or particularly good way to run a family. It might be less luxurious to force a family like that to commit to a 10 day vacation in Spain sans nanny between DH's work travel where you have to do parenting instead of just sitting by a pool drinking cocktails, but it's ultimately better for the family and your marriage. Strange but true.[/quote]

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