Reply to Would you tell dd to call less?

Forum Index » Adult Children

Reply to "Would you tell dd to call less?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Don’t withhold contact. Line up some therapy for the summer. She may need some extra support in finding her groove at college. My daughter had different issues than yours but needed a lot of time and contact. I’ve never regretted being there for her.[/quote]

She had therapy which was not helpful. And to be clear it’s not like I don’t want to be there for her. I worry I am there for her in such a way it makes things worse bc sure I don’t want her to be lonely, but I also don’t want to be the reason she does not try to find other outlets. People say it will pass but I know several people in their 30s and even 40s who never became independent. We have majorly stepped back on advice bc she does not listen or then does but says it doesn’t work. There has been zero progress with our current way.[/quote]
Then keep looking for a different therapist and/or a life coach. Some ACs require more active parenting for longer than others. I have a son that I never needed to do one thing for once he moved out. He was ready to roll. He manages his finances, submits anything that has to be submitted for insurance, he just launched. I mentioned my own DD above that needed tons of support for a long time. They all have different needs.

Your daughter is telling you that she does want friends, but she’s showing you that she doesn’t know HOW, or she’s too anxious to do it. Don’t just leave her in that space. [/quote]

I’m not saying I never want to talk to her! I just think the current situation is not good. We have tried to help her but she is rejecting everything while still expressing that she does want friends and that feels like a contradiction. I’m just not really sure what to do for her at this point but I know that listening to her has not worked and neither has giving advice. She was not receptive to the therapist (whom she picked) either. I guess she could see a different one but I do worry.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics