Reply to Letting young family member come live in your home?

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[quote=Anonymous]I have not seen the “other thread” that people are referring to. It would help if you answered the question about why she can’t live with your son at his home, if that is indeed true.

I’d be wary of thrusting yourself into a living situation with someone you barely know- not for lack of concern about your grandchild, but BECAUSE of your concern for your relationship with your grandchild. If things go sideways between you and the mother (which seems reasonably likely with the 2 of you living together), that could make things much worse.

Can you offer other assistance instead? Regular childcare while she and your son work, once her maternity leave is done ? (Need not be every day) Temporary financial assistance for a small apartment (deposit and first months rent etc) while helping her obtain any government assistance she qualifies for? Welcome her to visit or sleep over with baby in the guest room for the night  (do not make up a designated room that is “hers”) if she needs a break from the squabbling at home?

Without knowing the financial situation of all involved (her, son, you, her parents) it is hard to say what would be best.

Personally I would be wary of having her move in with you or being perceived as inserting yourself into the situation with her family. Barring a truly unsafe environment. She sounds recently postpartum and emotions are high, I’m sure. For her family as well. IMO they will end up reconciling and somehow you could be painted as meddling or as the “bad guy” somehow. Assistance with practical matters may be a safer bet and more helpful in the long run. [/quote]

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