Reply to Is pride really worth losing your family?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I find it really really weird when family cuts off other family. Invariably when I hear details, there are issues on both sides even if one person is more at fault.  I hear a lot of stories of defensive language like ‘they were toxic’ ‘I need boundaries’ etc but the reality is that if the person wasn’t also contributing in some way, they wouldn’t need to be so strident and rigid. I have a family member who is likely mentally ill and has caused tons of drama, but are they cut off? No. I feel sorry for them, realize they are a highly imperfect person and I look for ways to connect that are not high conflict. If I engage with them and fight, what does that say about me? I know I can’t expect them to operate on the same emotional level as I do. And that’s ok.

They/we are connected to each other in various ways and ‘cutting them off’ would impact not only me but others. And to me, that’s selfish and unfair. [/quote]

A parent telling my child they wish they never had me was the final straw

Is that good enough for you ? [/quote]

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