Reply to Am I wrong for refusing to host BIL?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What does excess drinking mean to you? A couple of beers or falling down drunk? That said, it’s your house. Good luck.[/quote]

A few beers a day, high functioning. I still don't want that around my kids.[/quote]

Sounds like you're using this as an excuse to stick it to your husband, BIL and MIL.[/quote]

This doesn't make sense because it's clear OP's dislike of her husband, BIL, and MIL is directly related to the totally dysfunctional behavior they are exhibiting in this incident. BIL has an ongoing and known drinking issue, MIL is trying to force OP to host him even though OP has already said no (it was a bit overreaching to even ask, but one no should suffice), and her husband is caving to pressure from his mom and brother instead of sticking up for his wife and kids. I don't even know these people and I dislike them on OP's behalf. None of that is acceptable.[/quote]

This is what the OP said:  "I hate her and my husband most days, So am I wrong?"

She hates them most of the time. Nothing specifically pertaining to BIL.

I'm not saying she's right or wrong, just that her judgment is clouded by her hatred of these people. Then when she added that BIL drinks a few beers a day, it is impossible to know based on that if he is or is not an alcoholic. And she mentioned nothing about how he behaves. She just doesn't like any of them and doesn't want BIL around.[/quote]

If she doesn't want him around then she shouldn't host him. Her husband can get together with him at their parents house or elsewhere.

It doesn't actually matter why she doesn't like him, though I tend to believe her that his drinking is at least part of it. I also think her gut is telling her this guy shouldn't be around her kids, and she should trust that instinct. The fact that her husband and MIL are trying to guilt her into hosting a grown man she doesn't like in her home says a lot about how they treat her generally.

OP doesn't owe her BIL anything. [/quote]

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