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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Speaking as a child of divorce, you need to tell your children gently but truthfully why their family is ending. Hiding the truth only leaves room for kids to blame themselves, and they will. The advice not to tell kids is from an adult perspective seeking to avoid shame and difficult discussions.[/quote]

Another kid of divorce and completely agree. Every situation is different but I was 12. It was incredibly insulting that they thought we didn't notice and it was cathartic when they did finally tell us a couple of years later--it wasn't us, we weren't crazy! That being said, I eventually came to the conclusion that their marriage was awful and the cheating was a catalyst to end it because they didn't have the courage to do it another way. It let me see things clearly and (with support) come to a peace with it. My own marriage is very different and much happier based on having all the information I needed to learn what I wanted/didn't want. I have a good relationship with both parents who are flawed but good human beings.[/quote]

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