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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You don’t tell your kids this. My God.[/quote]
Why the pearl-clutching? If the kids are old enough to understand there’s no need to keep secrets.[/quote]

So where does it end. Does the cheater tell the kids that the fairhful parents had bad breath and a smelly private area? Or do they tell them that the faithful partner refused to have sex with them?

Who will the kids believe? Remember that cheats are manipulative. ..[/quote]

They already know the marriage was bad so I don't think knowing those things would make a difference. It would only make the parent saying those things seem foolish.

The reason to tell about an affair is to explain things that cannot be explained any other way, and so that they hear it from their parents rather than from gossip.

In my case, my mother tried to present her AP as a "new" boyfriend and I initially accepted him and thought it was weird that my father disliked him. When I found out the truth, I disliked my mother and her AP, and felt that she had withheld the truth in an attempt to manipulate me into accepting him as a stepfather. I also lost my friendship with this man's child and didn't know why, until I found out about the affair and it made sense. These kinds of considerations and experiences, and how it can involve other people and the child's community, are what makes this different from other complaints people have about their marriage. [/quote]

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