Reply to Empty nest is not real until...When?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For me, my kids were financially self sufficient when they graduated from college and got real jobs. But then I was responsible for my mom until she died. Only since her passing two years ago have I finally felt untethered and have been able to focus on myself and my own needs and goals.

But from what I see going on around me, that will only last until either I have a grandchild or until either me or my spouse get sick. I am using this window of time to travel and exercise and enjoy my friends. I know it won’t last.[/quote]

How do you feel about it? It worries me sometimes. Like basically a woman is not a woman for herself anymore at any point once they become older (childless as well to some extent since you can have to take care of parents). It makes me feel a little selfish and sad and wondering if I can find some sort of balance between caring and being a good mom/grandma/child of adult parents and just existing for myself as well. I wonder how people (you, other women here, anyone!) tackle this or if people even usually have this thought.[/quote]

Does anyone ever exist soley for themselves, though? That seems sad. The elderly members of our family are constantly involved in doing for others, whether it is volunteering regularly at a food pantry, organizing protests, running a garden club, being a part of community activites at the assisted living home where they live, working on the board of a foundation, etc. People will always need each other in one way or another.[/quote]

I mean having days when you do not have calls about this issue or that issue or the need to do this for X person, like you can actually have a peaceful day to yourself without having to serve someone's needs. I very rarely have those. In fact, I couldn't tell you when I last did.[/quote]

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