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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My experience is that some kids are jerks. That the ones with good parents eventually grow out of it, and the ones with jerk parents become jerks. [/quote]

I don't think kids grow out of it so much as they are trained out of it. So I give a lot more leeway to younger kids who are still in training.

But even with young kids, when I see really egregious behavior and their parents are *right there* and I don't see even a gentle reminder of what better behavior would look like, I do judge. I see a lot of kids who are elementary and middle school age who are really being under-parented, with basically no feedback on stuff like interrupting, refusing to share, bragging, and putting other kids down. Like if your 9 or 10 year old is constantly interrupting people around her or criticizing or putting down peers and you say nothing at all, I 100% judge you. Yes, even if that kid has ADHD or some other challenge. I still don't really judge the kid at that age, but I judge the parents for failing to help their kid learn another way to handle that situation.

Once a kid is in HS I judge the kid too, though. I try to still have empathy because I recognize it's the result of poor parenting, but you can't go blaming your parents forever for your own bad behavior. At some point you need to gain the self awareness to recognize your behavior is hurtful to others and do better. [/quote]plus a million. It’s shocking what parents let their kids get away with [/quote]

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