Reply to MIL cuts us off, then demands holiday access. Advice?

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "MIL cuts us off, then demands holiday access. Advice?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't think you need to do anything. A lot of kids don't see their grandparents consistently and only on major holidays. Your kids don't need to know all the details of every conversation and drama between your MIL and you / your DH. Keep it away from them and when you see grandma you see her. If she is as horrible as you say, I doubt the kids care that they don't see her more often.

See her around the holidays and ignore her the rest of the time (or be ignored by her the rest of the time).

Trying to turn this into a confrontation is only going to backfire on you.[/quote]
The only thing that bothers me is the awkward tension she brings. The kids definitely feel it and we all walk on eggshells. This is the thing I’m tired of and don’t really know how to navigate.

—OP[/quote]

Talk to them about it. You all stop walking on eggshells . . . she WANTS you to walk on eggshells. "If grammy gets grumpy, just avoid her and do your thing."

My mom's mother was like this (worse than you describe, honestly). We just learned to ignore it when around her. My dad was really good at not giving in to her drama, and she pretty much left him alone.[/quote]
I’m genuinely curious what that looks like; can you describe what interactions look like? My MIL will come, won’t speak to anyone, will sit in a corner chair and twirl the ends of her shirt, speak in hushed murmurs, etc. None of us knows what to do with that. I’d love to hear your experience. Nothing we do or say breaks her out of it, so we all just watch awkwardly.

—OP[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics