Reply to DH continues his infidelity - Stuck and not sure what to do

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[quote=Anonymous]I’m the poster from the other thread about the 20-year marriage, “taking space,” and discovering he’s cheating, again.

I was in your shoes once, and I regret not moving toward divorce when my kids were younger. I grew up in a divorced household and was determined my children would never experience that. But instead, they grew up with two parents who did not show love, affection, or trust toward each other.

I’ve never felt the same about him since the first betrayal, and I don’t trust him. The dynamic affected our home more than I realized. My kids have even asked why I’m so cold or “awful” toward him. I don’t have the heart to tell them the truth, because I know it would permanently damage their relationship with their father.

From my experience: if you stay, he will do it again. And again. There’s no real incentive for him to change, he’ll keep pushing boundaries, and if he gets caught, he’ll ride out the fallout until things settle and repeat the cycle.

It’s incredibly hard, but sometimes the healthiest choice is the most painful one in the short term. Looking back, I believe divorce would have been better for everyone involved.[/quote]

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