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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I mean, you can say whatever you want to say in advance, but there is like a .000001 percent chance he will change. I would just pivot to laughing about it behind his back and letting it all go. My sister and I bond through laughing about the incredibly ridiculous things our dad says. [/quote]

Agreed. He’ll never change. It’s hard to laugh about it when I see my husband get so upset. FIL has never had a real conversation with him, ever. It’s all unwanted “critiques” and long monologues that center around himself. I personally just think he’s a socially awkward blowhard (potentially high functioning autism?) but I don’t want him to feel rejected by us either.  I think we are one of the last places where he is welcome. My husband says every time he’ll try to have a real conversation but it won’t happen.  Very sad. Also very, very annoying. [/quote]

This is so validating, because my dad is the exact same way.  I haven’t been able to have a real convo w him since maybe I was a kid, for the same reasons you cite.  And he is incredibly critical as well.   I am not nearly as kind as you because when he criticizes things in my house where he stays when he visits, I ignore him.  I can’t even engage enough ti pivot the conversation.  I look him dead in the eyes and then walk on.  My husband and I have tried so hard to ask real questions about his life experiences.   Heck I even had my son interview him on camera about a certain aspect of his life he loves to talk about.  But the responses even then were long monologues about himself that somehow don’t provide useful or interesting info.  [/quote]

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