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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DH filed for divorce and moved out, first to our vacation house and now he is in a rented house. He is coming this weekend to get “some clothes” but has said he won’t be taking the 6 boxes of his other possessions (books, mugs, important paperwork, personal items) that I’ve boxed up for him because “there isn’t space”. My kids are upset seeing his stuff and it’s in the way.

I understand that I can legally compel him to take this stuff, so not asking about how to go about that. But I am at a loss for why he wouldn’t just come get all of his clothes and personal items if there really isn’t that much of it and he has an entire house of his own.

Any idea why he is being like this?[/quote]

It's a weird thing with some people. Even when the person was the initiator and driver of the divorce, they have a hard time cutting all of the ties. My XH kept finding reasons to maintain joint accounts and not retrieve stuff, despite the fact that he left me for someone else and had already set up house with her. When pressed, he'd get pissy and defensive, but still not do whatever needed doing. I think some of it was entitlement on his part and some was just some subconscious holding on. I don't think he was intentionally clinging to whatever was left – but I needed it out of my sight for my own mental health. When it became clear that he'd dug in his heels – I ended up dumping stuff in a box and shoved it far out of sight so it didn't mentally press my buttons every time and finally it stopped bothering me. If you've got stuff boxed up, ask one final time and then find a place you can shove the stuff and get it out of sight. Cover it up. Letting it take up space in your brain is hurting you.  Don't let it.  [/quote]

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