Reply to Heading towards his first "B"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yeah I know.  It's okay.  Land the helicopter.  To him, I've only said encouraging comments--great job; I love to see how hard you're working; As long as you do your best, that's all that matters.

It's killing me though.  I know it's the grade he deserves.  It's AP Seminar and for my math loving science kid, this a new skill set, and one he can't power through.  I also recognize that of all his classes, this is the most valuable at the moment.  BC Calc is a breeze and chem isn't challenging nor is APES.  He's not a humanities kid so he takes honors level English and History and won't go near the AP classes in these subjects. This is his first real writing class.  He's leaning towards physics and says he wants his Phd--AP Seminar and AP Research are the classes that are going to give him those skills.

I will never share my thoughts with him but I had hopes that he would get through HS with straight As.  I also realize that one or two Bs won't be the end and he won't be applying to T50 schools.  So I suppose in the end it doesn't matter.  But it hurts me.[/quote]
As a former perfectionist, be grateful that he’s going to get the opportunity to not be “perfect”. Straight As for the sake of straight As is not an actual achievement that really matters. But it can become a problem with avoiding risk in the future and being overly stressed/anxious to the detriment of other things. If you haven’t been communicating that what is most important is challenging yourself, working hard and effectively, and adapting when things turn out differently than expected, now is your opportunity to adapt.[/quote]

+100000

Eventually he won't be "perfect" and will have to figure out how to keep pursuing his goals.   That's an important life skill that's best to learn early.

And the skill is NOT how to work harder to maintain perfection, but how to accept that being less than perfect isn't a barrier to achieving your goals. 
[/quote]

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