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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thanks for the kind words. I was feeling down this morning but feeling better now.

It's been a tough few years. I went from being a SAHM with zero job skills, to divorced making $10/hour, and over the last 3 years managed to build my salary to $80k. Things are still tight, and unfortunately I ended up with quite a bit of credit card debt along the way (which still hangs heavy over me), so money stresses me out and every dollar I see leave hits me hard.

I also had severe PPD after my second child (coupled with depression over my xH cheating and us splitting up), so I've been in survival mode for some time and let SO many things like routines slide. Now it just feels overwhelming trying to build them back up. And everything just has SO much friction, even just getting the kids ready, everyone is running around and not listening.

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1. What do you do for work? Turning your income around like that in just a few years time is impressive. Props to you and pat yourself on the back that's a huge accomplishment.

2. 9 and 3 are hard ages. Your kids are going through a tough transition as well and for kids stress often presents as behavior issues.

3. Make time for yourself when you don't have the kids. Do something that makes you feel good and no get yourself into therapy. You sound depressed. Connect with other divorced moms.

4. Pick one thing you want to work on with the kids and work on it and make it as positive as you can.Maybe it's getting  out the door in the morning lots of advice here and online for you to try.If you have a good parenting relationship with your ex here you can ask for support.   Just one thing don't overwhelm yourself.

5. Pick at least one activity to do with them every time you have them that's just fun. It doesn't have to be out of the house but it could be don't worry about mess or perfect it's about being together. Maybe it's pancakes for dinner and watching a movie snuggled in moms bed. Maybe you write a play together and record it.something they would enjoy and you would too.

You are not a bad mom. A bad mom wouldn't care. You're overwhelmed and have been through and doing a lot the last few years. Free yourself from the expectation of perfection. You can do this![/quote]

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