Reply to Spouse’s ex moved back, rejoined friend circle

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Here’s the twist-  I’m the ex that moved back.

Trying to give the wife the benefit of the doubt, I posted from her perspective. DH has agreed not to be around me after she gave him an ultimatum.

It’s created an uncomfortable air in our friend group, especially when trying to plan events.  [/quote]

I was the first reply, who said reasonable lol. [b]How do you know your ex and wife are going through a rough patch? [/b]That already suggests you are too emotionally involved.

Look, you should attend any event you want. You certainly should not have to arrange your schedule around his wife being available to babsit. But if he sits out because of an arrangement he has with his wife, that's their business and it's not for you and your friend group to take a poll and say it s wrong. [/quote]

Our mutual friend mentioned it to me when explaining the possible reasons for the wife’s ultimatum.   [/quote]
You all sound like a bunch of immature gossips.[/quote]

I think this is what DCUM likes to call "enmeshed" except DCUM always applies it to families but it makes more sense to apply it to a friend group which you could easily walk away from. Adults with families don't need to be hanging out with a friend group all the time. It's fine if you do, as long as everyone is healthy and happy, but not if it gets to this dramatic extent where someone can't come because someone else will or will not be there, etc. I wonder if these hangouts involve heavy drinking and drama.[/quote]

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