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[quote=Anonymous]See how midterms go. Then ask your DC how they’re feeling.

If they’re feeling good about their grades, step back and let go. Even if the grades aren’t as high as you’d like. Trust that they’re growing and learning in other ways this semester and will be just fine.

However, if they sound overly anxious, or worried or at a loss about how to possibly “catch up” this late in the semester etc. pay closer attention. You don’t want a kid who’s used to getting straight A’s suddenly spiraling about academics.

Recognizing that someone has to be at or below the middle of the class (and that’s ok!!),   if they seem anxious or spiraling, try coaching them a bit - encourage THEM to come up with some new behaviors to try.

I was that freshman, by the way, back when core classes were set on a B- curve. Rough start, but I was oblivious/in denial first semester (overconfident/less mature) and then started figuring it out slowly. Got a math turor. Learned to go to the library to crank every night after dinner, before going out.

My parents were sweetly supportive, which helped me course-correct on my own timeline with minimal mental health issues. Unlike in high school, when they were hard core tiger patents, they recognized that I had to mature at my own pace in college.

They also knew that getting in to the Ivy was the hardest part. With or without top grades, it would be a life-long asset. They were 100% correct. No Latin honors and no regrets.

Those four years were the most transformational of my life, academically, socially, and emotionally. For me, the benefits of thise non-academic experiences (clubs, sports, going out, hanging out) far outweighed the cost of every B-, including lack of access to the “top” jobs and grad schools immediately after graduation. Life is long. It’s important to live and grow on ALL dimensions.[/quote]

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