Reply to STBX melting down during divorce

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Anyone else experience this? STBX/former DH initiated divorce pretty much out of nowhere in a male menopause midlife crisis sort of moment.

He is a smart and successful man, but I don’t know that he thought much beyond filing, and it turns out that attorneys don’t coach you through that before you hire them- they just file and keep moving you along.

I’m relieved that he filed and gave me some clarity about aspects of his character that I had been doubting.

But he seems to be falling apart and inconvenienced, frustrated, and tantruming about his own choice to divorce. He is making both attorneys mad by not cooperating with things like basic document requests. He doesn’t seem to understand that I’m not responsible for supporting his needs anymore, and he throws a fit whenever there’s a deadline that conflicts with things he’s rather do or his work schedule. He doesn’t want to talk about housing or money and is basically putting his fingers in his ears.

Has anyone else experienced a short-sighted divorce initiator? I can’t believe my STBX was so naive as to not think beyond the impulse to file and consider what life might look like age that, yet somehow he found the energy to actually find an attorney and file. It’s like he was briefly fueled by short-term spite but now there’s nothing left in the tank.

He chose this! What’s his problem?![/quote]

I don’t know, but I think i understand from the contempt that oozes from your post why he is divorcing you. I wish him peace. [/quote]

Should she feel sorry for him? Hold his hand?

You're unbelievable and probably a man child like the one who is trying to divorce OP. [/quote]

As an example, STBX sent me an email last night saying he was really tried and didn’t have the bandwidth to pull [easily available document] for me and it was an excessive request anyway. For other stuff that included a joint tax return amendment that I didn’t have a copy of, he’s said “that’s my private information.” Unfortunately we do have to do discovery and it is doing to make him very hostile. I almost feel bad for his attorney when they have to explain to him how that will work.[/quote]

I would not communicate directly with him about any of this. It could backfire on you. That's what lawyers are for. You've made requests for documents and have noted that he is not providing them. I hope he has a lawyer who is smart enough to tell him that doing things this way will only cost him way more money.[/quote]
Yeah right. An hourly lawyer telling a dimwitted client to respond more quickly, or at all, so they don’t pay the lawyers more and more?!? [/quote]

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