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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No. I think most of the girls my DD is friends with are pretty sweet. The ones who seem "mean" are usually kids with older sisters or unfettered access to TV content aimed at teens. She is in third grade. Maybe it's coming. [/quote]

+1, the ones with older sisters are the worst.  And the ones whose parents are divorced.[/quote]

I have to agree with these two comments and it's interesting because it all speaks to the same issue: girls who are being exposed to older, more mature, or even adult ideas and behaviors before they are ready.

I really see this in my DD's friend group (also 3rd grade), where there are some girls who essentially play-act at being teenagers or even adults but have no idea what they are doing and the result is meanness. Also, as an adult witnessing this behavior, it's very obvious the girls who instigate this behavior are feeling very insecure and trying to compensate for it. My own daughter can't see this, she only sees, for instance, that a class mate is making fun of her for wearing the "wrong" clothes or not knowing enough about a certain pop culture artifact. Whereas I see a kid who is desperately trying to prove to herself and likely others that she's a grown up. It's actually very sad.

And then I think about mean girl dynamics I've experienced in my own life, including some in adulthood, and see the parallels. It is deeply sad that it starts this early. All these kids need more nurturing and more opportunities to be young, immature, make mistakes, and feel accepted.[/quote]

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