Reply to At what cost do you help your adult kids after getting them through college?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My dad had a good system in my opinion -

He would pay for up to five years of education.
If you got scholarships, he would pay you some of that back in cash when you graduate as money to help with something like a car down payment. Since your college funds were not fully depleted. I received about $15K.
No other help on house, expenses, etc. - no money whatsoever 
Once every few years, if we do a family trip, he will pay for everyone.

Clear boundaries and I knew there was no money coming. I was very motivated and strategic in my career because I knew I had to make money.[/quote]

Who can pay to provide financial leg up to their children?  Only people who have the money.  And money is earned many a times (not in every case) by some inherent privilege that gives the people an advantage over others.

We are not privileged or connected people. A debt-free college education was the least that we could give them. But we planned for state college and STEM majors. We did not fund for private college and non-employable majors.

My kids are well aware that the money that we give is not endless and they have to stand on their own two feet in the end. But, our help goes a long way in leveling the playing field for them.  They also know that if they want to live with us without paying us any rent or board, we are fine with it. As long as they are saving and investing their money and they can take better care of their family and do better by them.  
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