Reply to If I had know this was the case, I probably wouldn't have married you.

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Reply to "If I had know this was the case, I probably wouldn't have married you."

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, as a HD person married to a HD person, I am actually going through a LD phase due to caring for young children.  Before kids came along, I was insatiable, as was (and is) DH.  Unfortunately, due to difficult childbirth, the exhaustion of caring for small kids, and just the additional cares and worries that pile on top of you once you have kids in general, I entered into a LD phase about 3 years ago when DD was born.  HOWEVER, my LD phase is not an excuse to not meet the needs of our marriage (note how I didn't say DH's needs, it's more than that to me).  IMO, men need the sex to feel close to their spouse.  This is very important to a marriage, and a sustainable partnership.  Unfortunately, women need to feel close to want to have sex.  My feelings: if you are in a sexless marriage, something is off with how your wife is perceiving you.  Even people who are satisfied with 1x a month (like several friends, male and female, of mine), recognize that it is an important part of their marriage, and do more.

You sound very resentful and unhappy (not surprising), and a tad unsympathetic (this is what you need to work on).  If you had a talk with your DW and nothing *really* changed, you need to revisit or get in therapy with her ASAP.  This is so very important to your marriage, and I think you are well within your rights to bring up counseling with DW.  That being said, if you had the talk and then DW had a baby, it is unlikely that things were going to change right at that point.  The height of my LD phase was the 6 months after my kids were born.  DH understood that, and while we still had sex more frequently than it sounds like you are doing, there WILL be a lull.  I still think counseling is a good idea.  [/quote]

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