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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
In your world, what does a woman have to do for her husband to be considered a real woman?[/quote]

Not being sarcastic here, but I'm not quite following your question to my previous post.  Or, maybe it's so obvious to me that it's hard for me to remember that it's NOT obvious to everyone, and I need to try and convey it.

The harmonious counterpoint to a man who strives with 100% effort to make the most of his talents for the sake of the marriage, is a woman who strives with 100% effort to make the most of her talents for the sake of the marriage.

As always, I feel like this is a damn good place to start...

[i]Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. [/i]

But the answer in practice varies from woman to woman, and man to man, and marriage to marriage.  My wife's specific talents are too numerous to list.  Offhand, she's REALLY good at her job and has a great analytical mind, and that has led to a job where she's reasonably successful and fulfilled.  Yet she has not let work dominate the balance of her life; she has chosen (totally her choice) to decline promotion offers into supervision, because she knows that dealing with people would frustrate her and spill over into personal / family / parenting time.  She's extremely thoughtful and emotionally intelligent, whereas I'm more of the aloof, tweedy academic type, so she has allowed us to have "couples" friendships that I wouldn't have successfully maintained without her.  She has a few hobbies that she's passionate about and well-known for among our friend group and community for those talents, but she doesn't feel like she deserves ridiculous amounts of "me time" -- just like I don't think I deserve selfish amounts of "me time" either, since my wedding vows were to be part of a two-person, life-long team.  We have eventually developed an appreciation for each other's interests, so hobbies have also become shared time, rather than time apart.  She's healthy and fashionable, but not obsessively / narcissistically so; thus in that regard she inspires me to think a bit more about having a complimentary wardrobe at a time of life where it would be really easy to stop giving a damn about that as a man.

[quote=Anonymous]
If she also needs to tirelessly give 100% day and night to attend to and honour her husband in order to be a real woman, then she is probably having sex with him. [/quote]

Maybe, but my take was... that sort of approach is putting the cart before the horse.  Maybe we're only getting her side of the story, but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt for the moment and believe that the husband is a childish a-hole.

Men don't take much to feel like having sex.  Women need an emotional connection.  This guy is a putz who has emotionally abandoned his wife.  If he can't see this and won't make the first move by pulling himself together, then I'd say he's a lost cause.

It's not her job to initiate fixing this by having more sex.  Being a loving wife is not the same as being a doormat.[/quote]
You have any idea how op’s marriage is. Reading ur entire post along with u giving op the benefit of doubt without knowing ANY facts makes you sound like an ass kisser. [/quote]

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