Reply to My happiness level from 1 - 10 in my marriage is...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]8  sex life is pretty bad but everything else is pretty good[/quote]

I'm going to have to give it a 7 due to the same issue.

It is not for lack of trying on my DHs part, I just don't feel the chemistry with him. My drive is very high, just not for him. I respect him and he is a good husband/father, so I will suffer that aspect of my life in silence. I wish I were French and then I'd just have a boyfriend.[/quote]

Are some of the things that make him a good husband and father potentially incompatible with sexual chemistry? For example, being independent and mysterious can be sexy but tend to be bad qualities for a nurturing father and husband. [/quote]

Probably.  I think the fact that he is so available a bit of a turn off.

In the grand scheme of things, I think the benefits of having a good father for my children and a good husband (we truly enjoy each others company) outweigh having great sex. Luckily I'm a good faker, I'd never want him to know this.[/quote]

NP here. Was there EVER chemistry or did you marry him for security, etc?[/quote]

There was, but never that super hot steamy sex and I am pretty sexual, so I crave that.  When alcohol is involved, we do have some pretty porn worthy sessions, but I had that with prior lovers regularly....but those guys were often amazing in bed, but a hot mess in a relationship.

You can jump all over me, but I'm going to say it...his growing mid section is a huge turn off.  It irritates the hell out of me because I'm the one who had the babies and work full time and have busted my ass getting back into shape and he remains sloppy. It certainly does not help things.[/quote]

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