Reply to Dealing with a moody child that impacts our day over small things

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]And I’m sorry, spilling a drink is not a big deal. Sorry you won’t convince me otherwise and I think it does a disservice to a child to get bent out of shape and give a massive reaction over spilling half a clear soda. Especially at 9 years old. [/quote]

Whoa. Ok. Here’s your truth coming out and your son totally feels this.

Can you put yourself in his shoes? In reality he IS bent out of shape, he is having the reaction he is having. He’s having it AND feeling bad for having it!

You have him in a double-bind. [/quote]

Oh stop. I actually dealt with real problems as a child, like my parents dying when I was his age in a tragic way. So I do believe it is doing a major disservice to a 9 year old when a glass of sparkling water spilling outside becomes a major family issue. Yes, he’s having a reaction and I’m trying to figure out how he can handle it for what it is.  I’m sorry but a glass of water spilling can’t be a major issue and that’s why some of you have nonfunctional kids now. [/quote]

OP, take a moment and think about this.  When we suggest something you don’t agree with with you: (1) tell us you had it way worse; (2) insult our kids and our parenting; and (3) refuse to see another point of view.

And you seriosuly can’t figure out why your kid feels ignored and anxious around you and only you?[/quote]

+1
Your child is reacting to the way you judge. He isnt good enough for you. You are mad at him because he has an easier life, but still has a mental processing problem. You dont think he "deserves" to have any anxiety. You didn't and he should be strong too. Your attitude is causing his anxiety to worsen.[/quote]

+2 I’m sorry op. You’re not wrong that spilling a drink isn’t a big deal. But it sounds like you experienced some extremely traumatic things around the same age as your child and it is not uncommon that when your own child is around a similar developmental age it can be especially hard as a parent who had a hard childhood.

if you are really looking for an answer here, getting some parent coaching so you have space to work through how to support his anxiety, your relationship and connection, especially in the context of your own experiences and how it might impact how you perceive their emotions/responses to things is the first place to start. Generally with anxiety in kids parent coaching is one of the more effective tools anyway. [/quote]

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