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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I agree with those who think there is some underlying anxiety. Counseling would be good- you need someone who works on the process/pattern of it.

You reassuring, talking tons to keep his reaction down does not help his anxiety long term. The thing about anxiety is it won’t go away- and you need some of it, it is good. What you and he need is to learn more about it and how to handle. There are lots of programs discussing SPACE which treats anxiety ONLY working with the parents. Parents change the way they engage with the child and the child’s anxiety changes.

I think Lynn Lyons podcast is great. And so are her books. She has a playlist on her podcast of  where parents can start with their anxious child. She breaks things down clearly into the pattern of anxiety/ whatever way it presents. This is a great age to start dealing with this.

I’m sorry. It has to be challenging to have such explosive reactions come your way and not know what will set him off. It does impact your family and addressing this will help everyone.

Lisa Damour I think explained mental health as having an appropriate reaction to the stimulus- if you spill your drink and get really upset- that isn’t mentally healthy. If you lost a big soccer game and get frustrated- yes that’s ok. You can be mad but a tantrum, nope not good either. Perhaps that definition will help you in seeing that he could use some support in managing his emotions- whether he can name them or not, he can feel them. [/quote]
And that’s why I have tried various tactics over the course of 2-3 years as another PP agreed they have as well. The professionals state the best way to handle it is to say “I’m sorry you’re disappointed and upset you spilled the drink” but that doesn’t work either. [/quote]
Is this OP?  What do you mean, that doesn't work?  [/quote]

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