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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would have an honest conversation with the other mom. She needs to know that her combination of strict rules plus inattention to time is causing a hardship — it either needs to be one or the other (or ideally neither).

“Can you tell me more about why you’re reluctant to allow Larla and Darla to be at my house without an adult home, even temporarily. The reason I ask is that our family’s schedule — and especially mine — isn’t really set up to guarantee 100% constant supervision the way we did when the girls were little. Sometimes I need to run out for a quick errand. And sometimes I have plans immediately following Larla’s planned pickup time. If that time comes and goes and she’s still here, I feel like I have to choose between upsetting you by leaving them alone, or having to cancel my appointment at the last minute. Which can be both frustrating and expensive.”[/quote]

This is very firm while also being kind.[/quote]

No, I would not ask her why she isn’t allowing her to be alone.  That’s not your business and too personal.  Just stick to the facts and tell her you can’t guarantee you will be home the entire time.  It’s up to her if she allows her daughter to come over.  They are too old to expect a parent home at all times.

The mom could have had something happen in her past that she doesn’t need to tell you.  It is what we have always suspected with our DD’s friends mom and the only reason we can think for her overly protective rules.  We comply when we can but don’t lie and say we are with the girls when we aren’t. We just stick to facts.  [/quote]

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