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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your description of your SIL is way too cold given what she's going through. Also, it's not morally right to discuss the fallout of her demise on an internet forum when she's not in hospice yet.

It's obvious you're very much relishing the drama without sparing a thought to this poor human being who is currently suffering. You are a very flawed person, and I hope one day you understand this.
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Huh? It’s an anonymous forum and I gave no details that could identify her nor does she read this forum as she doesn’t live around here. Not sure who “discussing” this here is hurting, so I don’t think morals are in question. Nor am I sure what relishing and what drama you’re referring to.[/quote]

You're deliberately misunderstanding. There is no risk of identifying anyone. But it's not right to discuss a potentially dying relative in the terms you've used, one that apparently has done you no harm. Stop using "failure to launch", especially if you say that there are health issues involved (whether mental or physical). You give the impression you're blaming her and that she is "less than". You clearly have a sense of superiority and it shows, which is very graceless of you when she apparently has a terminal cancer diagnosis. What I read was: "My husband might suffer from the death of this unimportant and inferior relative, but right now he doesn't realize it, what can I do?"

All of this could have been easily averted if you had just said the two siblings had nothing in common, but you were still worried about potential fallout. And then I'd have told you, more nicely, to wait, because there was nothing you could do right now.

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Failure to launch is a term used by therapists/psychiatrists and generally describes her situation. Nowhere in my post did I suggest blame/judgment. Maybe it’s you who thinks that a person like this is “less than”? I said no such thing.[/quote]

Every one except you knows that some medical terms are archaic and accusatory. Like "incompetent cervix" for example. "Failure to launch" is another such term. Don't use it to describe someone whom you don't actively and legitimately resent!

But maybe this is what it's all about? You hate your SIL?

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So psychiatrists resent their patients? That’s the only context I’ve heard it used in but ok sure, I won’t use it again.

Nope - no hate but glad you’re getting a kick out of the speculation.
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