Reply to How much to push my kid out of her comfort zone?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Use money or whatever currency she values, to bribe her. I have a son like this, super shy. We were at a holiday party and I told him I would give him money for each person he audibly said hi to.  Start small and try to make it a game. He doesn't like greeting friends outside school. Same bribe. He didn't immediately go and say hi to gazillion people but he said hi to a couple and I think it slowly normalizes the experience and he knows it didn't kill him or anything.

This son also does an instrument that has recitals. I use money again to bribe. It worked, and he was able to do it the second time when he couldn't the first time. I think it helped him view the recital as not just this painful experience for no reason, but as a way to earn money. With that end goal to focus on, he was able to withstand the discomfort better. I am hoping these paid experiences teach him that these events are survivable and can turn into a source of pride. And of course he is also learning to regulate that overwhelming shyness.[/quote]
Absolutely do not do this. Wow.[/quote]

DP but my child has selective mutism and social anxiety and therapists use rewards systems all the time in exposure therapy. Maybe not physical money, but a token system that a child can exchange for prizes of their choice when they’ve successfully completed a little challenge like ordering food, saying hi to a new person, etc. it actually works really well. [/quote]

Maybe it's just the difference in language that you and PP using, but she specifically said bribe and that just really rubs me the wrong way. Maybe that PP is just not a native English speaker and I misunderstood what she was trying to say. [/quote]

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